We need a new word in our lexicon: “Prehearse”. You will not find it in the Cambridge, Oxford or Webster’s dictionaries. So, let’s start it now. It means to mentally prepare for a new experience by clearing our head of preconceived notions allowing us to encounter them openly, purely and fully. While rehearse practices what we know, prehearse prepares us for what we don’t know.

Its well established older relative (rehearse) has its roots in two Old French words “re’ (repeat) and “herce” (a harrow, rake or plowing instrument). Combined, they convey the image of a repeated action to prepare the soil before sowing the seed. By the 13th century, it came to mean reciting words over and over. By the 16 th century “rehearse” referred to practicing your lines in a play. Prehearse, however, deals with something new. And you cannot rehearse what you have not done before.

A paramedic told me he used to prepare himself while headed to an emergency call by rehearsing in his mind everything he was about to do. On an emergency call responding to a young child who was choking he prepped his go bag and mindset with how to clear the child’s airway. The child was not responsive to their efforts, so he stopped and then after a quick re-check realized the child ingested a poison. Now, instead of rushing into the emergency with a rehearsed mindset that can make him initially blind to important details, “I clear my mind, prepared for anything.”

We have an inherent tendency to project what we have learned from the past into the present. We make sense of the unfamiliar by making it familiar, to better manage the moment. In preparing for a job interview, or anticipating meeting a new person, you will probably practice what you will do or say, rehearsing your words, emotions and actions based on assumptions from past experiences. That can work pretty well in many circumstances, but what if your past experiences does not fit the new situation? In that case, our rehearsal taints our new encounter with the wrong thoughts, feelings and actions, making the new encounter clumsy at best, and disastrous at worst. We rehearsed the wrong behavior, leading to social blunders and embarrassment.

A more common maladaptive rehearsal involves repeating in your head an argument you had with someone that morning, and then taking out your anger on innocent others the rest of the day. Or it’s rehearsing a political or religious aversion so much in our head that we are close-minded to learning another point of view.

One particularly maladaptive rehearsal is a phobia: an irrational fear of a person, place or thing that triggers a panic attack. To even think about the trigger sets off a chain of intense physical anxiety: rapid heart rate, shortness of breath, sweating, chest pains. The phobia is irrational (such as a fear the number thirteen, or mirrors) and the person may take extreme steps to avoid it (such as taking the steps in a building to avoid fear of elevators).

But even thinking about the panic trigger can elicit the panic reaction, so they mentally elude any interaction (creating a mental image of staying away from a store to avoid the agoraphobic fear of crowds). That trigger-avoidance-calming rehearsal reinforces our fears. Overcoming the phobia starts with thinking about the trigger in a totally new way: that we are going toward it, calmly, with a mind intentionally cleared of harmful thoughts. This takes some work because a person who has been rehearsing the wrong reaction, is unaccustomed and lacks confidence with this new way.

And this is where prehearse comes into play: to allow us to prepare for an experience by taking intentional steps ahead of time to clear our thoughts and emotions before we start something new. It requires us to pause, to take a few deep breaths, to be fully mindful in the moment and only this moment, while blocking out any anxieties about the past or worries of the future. It is a mighty tool that allows us to fully appreciate the moment. We avoid rehearsing any interfering thoughts and listen with an open mind. Meditate on success. Forget the grudge. Forget anticipating you won’t like it. Forget being closed minded. Forget anticipating you will argue whatever the other person says to you. Instead, prehearse you will be present listen with confident emotional calm.

I recall when I was preparing to walk my daughter down the aisle on her wedding day. As we stood alone in the back of the church awaiting our cue, I had planned to say something very special to her, something I had rehearsed may times. But this experience was totally unique. I did not prepare myself for the powerful newness of the moment, and became tongue tied. A little prehearsal would have calmed me down.

In matters of business, motivating employees and customers to embrace a paradigm shift will benefit from an invitation to a prehearsal mindset. In matters of faith, Jesus spoke of bringing something “new”, inviting people to stop rehearsing old ways and welcome the fresh message he was bringing.

Whether preparing for matters of behavioral, mental, emotional, or spiritual change, the ability to “prehearse” can go a long way towards opening our minds and calming our hearts to learning and growth.

So, what do you think?

© 2023 Tim Murphy